On my list of goals for this year is “Write in blog at least twice per week.”
Every time I think “Oh, I should write about this in my blog,” I don’t. Yes, writing takes effort, especially when it is not a part of my habit, but I am not sure the effort is the part that holds me back.
I think I’m afraid.
I’m afraid to admit my mistakes, my shortcomings, my downfalls. But even more so, I am afraid to admit my discontentedness. Vocabulary.com defines discontentedness as
“a longing for something better than the present situation.”
I would almost say I feel ashamed of it.
I have incredible, healthy, children who are loved and well-cared for. I have a family, a house, a car, a job (an infinitely better situation than the grueling two job schedule I had before)…I have a lot of things that so many people do not. Yet I still feel compelled to come here and have the guts to complain about some aspect of my job or my life that is unfair. I may justify it by sharing what I am learning being in a certain situation. By thinking I can help someone else who has struggled with a similar issue. Maybe I can. But first, I have to be humble. I have to examine my reasons for sharing. Am I wanting to truly help others or am I looking for an outlet to complain and gather sympathy?
Once I’ve conquered that, then, maybe, I can share what I’ve learned.